Average Week

So far it's been a pretty average week.

I stayed home from school on Monday and just watched The Sopranos and slept.
It was nice.
I was really sick, though... My allergies were REALLY bad and I had a cold.

I still feel pretty crappy, but today and yesterday were okay overall.
School's not so bad, really... I just hate starting the day.

In some ways, I'm really really ready to be done with high school. I'm dying to move out to the East Coast. I'm pretty sure my parents are planning on moving back after I graduate. I used to be sad about that because I wanted to stay in Fargo, but now I'm so ready to join them...though they want to move to South Jersey (where my dad is from), and I'd rather move to Philadelphia... but whatever. South Jersey (for the most part) and Philly are like... Fargo and Moorhead, almost. I'm also kind of looking forward to college. I think it'll be a great experience... I just REALLY have NO idea where I want to go. :/

However, in other ways I'm clinging on to high school as tightly as I can.. It's stressful at times, but really, it's not that bad.... I mean, you're still under your parents' roof and all and they're the ones providing for you, so you really don't have to do that much. Also, I like my friend and it'll be really sad to leave them or see them leave (depending on whether I stay in Fargo for college or not). I'd like to think I'll be able to keep in touch with people, but who knows what'll happen...

I feel really old being a senior at school, but I guess if you look at a lifetime, I'm still quite young.

Lately I've just been so paranoid about things. I get these crazy, unnatural fears of like... dropping dead the next day out of nowhere because anything can happen. Obviously if I'm dead I can't have any regrets, but I'm afraid that I won't get to do what I want to do before I die, so I'm trying to make the most of everything these days.

I really ought to get another job. I really don't want one, but I miss the income. I'm always afraid to spend money now even though I have quite a lot saved up... I just need a steady income. However, I need a really flexible weekend job or something because I want to actually be able to do shit this year... It's my last year of high school and I want to do as much with JCL, pep band, Socratic, friends, family, and so on. I don't want to waste all my time working at a job I don't even realllllllly need.

I'm taking the SAT next month. I'm a bit nervous about that. I have to start preparing for that... Oh, and I'm retaking the ACT next month as well. I got a 26, which isn't too bad, but I was hoping for at least a 30, so I hope I can achieve that this time around.

College applications truly scare the living daylights out of me. Actually, I guess they don't even really scare me all that much... Just the thought of college applications gets me really stressed out. I hope I can do well with college apps.

I hope I can stop being so lazy, unproductive, uninspired, and unmotivated. I waste so much time. I'm tired of having so many regrets. I need to just...do more.

I'm really looking forward to this weekend.
Friday should be quite a blast to say the least. ;) Pep band and a partaaaaay at the Leins'. ;)

I really truly sincerely hope that the last two days of the week go by quickly!