Today I talked to some people and resolved a couple of things. Nothing big, really... just a lot of ongoing miscommunication and misunderstandings. Hopefully things will improve in that aspect of my life. It's looking good. :)
I had a very quiet weekend. Really, that's exactly what I needed, so I'm glad I was able to just take some time to chill and be alone. I did a lot of self-reflection this weekend.
Maybe this sounds like it contradicts itself, but I think that I am a good person... but I don't like myself. I think that I'm friendly, that I'm a good listener and an overall good friend, that I'm somewhat humorous at times, that I'm fairly intelligent, and that I always have good intentions. That sounds like a pretty good person to me. However, I could go on to list a plethora of flaws and problems that I have with myself, but I won't bore you with those since that's not really the point and I don't want this post to reek of self-pity. :P
Basically, I think what I mean is that I know I'm a good person to other people and as a general rule, but when I look inside myself, I don't like what I see.
I hope that one day I'll be able to say that I like myself...and truly mean it. Hell, I hope that one day I can even simply become comfortable with myself. Even that would be progress.
I'm not asking for you to leave me happy comments full of compliments. I'm not fishing for compliments or anything like that. I don't want that. Really, I'm just sharing some of my reflections. People always tell me that they'd wish that I'd open up and share more, so I thought I'd open up a bit here.
Oh well.
I don't really have anything else to say.
3 comments:
i feel the same way. i try so hard to be "good" etc but i still don't like who i am.
i like who you are, though :)
I think you're an amazing listener. Even when we've both been a bit..meh..with each other and not in the best moods I can still come to you and not be scared to talk about something on my mind. :D
Two years ago I really hated myself as a person. I thought I was selfish and I got tons of shit from people and I didn't think I was worth anybody's time. 11th grade kind of made me realize not to give a crap what people think and after thinking like that I've finally become comfortable with myself. Hopefully you're able to come with terms soon because it sucks not liking who you are.
you're able to come with terms soon
I don't really know why I worded it like that ^^ XD
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